For a long time I wondered if I would get in trouble for writing this blog. I've already been contacted once by an attorney and several times by the police. There was always another issue that they would bring up but I think we all know that exposing something like this comes with a price, even though they charge you on a different item. We know what a troublemaker is in a criminal organization, but what about a whistleblower outside of the organization that just wanted to do the right thing?
I always think about the parents of these victims and the young kids in the films that Anthony and I saw. I want to be that guy that saw and went through what I did and learned how to tell people about it. There are ways to do that, certainly, but many of them came with a sense of not being permanent or enough. I don't ever want to meet the mother of a suicide victim knowing that there was more to the story than they knew. Most of the people that I know that are implanted are nice people until this gets a hold of them. How could I talk to the family of someone that committed suicide and not be able to say I could have done more?
The damage to these kids in these horrible videos is irreparable without help. I've already been the 19 year old kid that became HIV positive without knowing how I could have gotten that? It's really hard, though now I guess it would be different if they had these kinds of medications back then. Then, that news meant an early death from a painful disease, but now it means something different for the infected. Still, the damage there is done psychologically. There is a reason that these kids need to be found. They are in danger and quite possibly don't even know they have this disease. I'll bet they all know Lori had something to do with it though. They call her Sheree or Jessica.
I like the "I want to be that kind of guy" perspective when I make decisions. I think in a more global perspective with my friends and these victims, obviously I know some, many I don't. I am so certain that we will find commonality of experience and a progression of this crime's intricacies as we go along. I can't wait to hear other people's stories. Police stories. Mostly though, it's what we have to say about this experience that will shock people...it's much harder than most people think.
