"A Home At The End of the World" is probably my favorite movie because of all the great themes at play. It alway reminds me of what I wanted for Christopher and me.
Sometimes, Lori tells me that, "It's never going to happen," or "...over her dead body." It's sad when mental health issued are involved, isn't it? You see someone like Lori, who you would normally try to understand, but then you realize that every single solitary word that comes from her mouth is a manipulation in her favor. It's not very hard to see. Lori always has a thing for any female that is a friend of mine but having my own boyfriend is not something that she will allow. She simply won't have it.
Lori needs to be in TB quarantine with syphilis...without the internet to distract her. She needs to sleep, eat and not be near other people until this infection that she has chewing at her mind, goes away. We know she isn't taking any kind of HIV medication and is completely unwilling to go and get a check up. From the information that I've been getting, the drugs and testosterone have her thinking that she is "muscular" and "in shape". I don't think that what we are hearing and what she will purport in a selfie is the actual truth, do you? That's an awful lot of nights in a row to miss a sleep session, just so she can't rant and rave. There's built up anger there that I can't possibly help her with.
All I want to do is sit on the grass with Christopher and talk. Play with his puppy and our kitty cat. It's been a very long time and I know he needs to see me. This is how he is. He likes to know that I am okay. He doesn't like Lori getting her big fat mouth involved. Then her brother, Brian, kicks in with his "in love with Jonathan" speeches, and the whole thing turns into, "Why did Lori do all those stupid things?"
I can't imagine pretending someone is your boyfriend and then in real life making him look dead to his parents and friends back home. Was that her finest thinking on meth? There was no way that plan was going to succeed. There was no possible way that meeting up with Christopher or Anthony was going to work either. Is this the way she does things while she is suffering from syphilis dementia? It could be. A doctor, like Dr. Elmore or someone that she knows needs to step in. There is a Hippocratic Oath thing going on too. We need Lori alive to be prosecuted. Lori's mental health is not good. She's suffering from delusional moments of grandeur followed immediately by "hating everyone in the world." She hates "God". She hates me. She hates my friends. She hates her family. She hates her father for something or other.
One minute she's a total bitch and the next a SUPER MEGLADON MEGA ULTRA BITCH. There is no room for anything other than the opposite of what I think when it comes to her. This is useful.
I spend my time wanting to go back to the gym, but I really don't want to live here in this area. I want to work out with my boyfriend finally. Lori's been so destructive by putting him in jail and causing all kinds of financial problems and he's never been able to enjoy California. Ever since he got out to Palm Springs, it's been non-stop Lori torture for him and it's going on ten years. Two months from now will be ten years since she and her brother attacked him in San Diego at Jonathan's family's home. I should know, I found a map to that home in the place where Brian left all his shit in Jonathan's apartment. I even video taped it.
We all know that Brian and Lori were responsible for that, don't we? If Lori says otherwise, she's probably lying to you. They got a speeding ticked on the way home to Palm Springs using Christopher's license. A car full of stolen goods on their way back from hurting Christopher. I want her caught for being so mean to him.
I just want to spend time with my boyfriend, Christopher.
