As there is with everything else, there is a top spot for everything. Usually Missy Pissy and Bessie Smith charge in and take my place while I am working, but in this case I'm fairly sure that this vacancy won't be filled by either one of those coat tail riders. The vacancy now posted is for the public face of electronic harassment in Palm Springs. There really isn't a second or third place candidate either since nobody else is willing to step forward, so the top three positions are completely open. Since filming the news story by KMIR 6, Randy Ringger, passed away of a brain tumor, common with electronic harassment victims, lucky guy, wish it was me and Bob Stansfield hasn't offered to take up the position, so Jeffrey has to find someone to fill the podium that won't talk about Lori, will do everything he says and won't talk about the crime. Um, that's kind of not the point of this position but it is a necessary one.
You can't talk to the police or the government or he'll ruin your life.
You can't have a job.
You aren't allowed to have any friends.
No boyfriends or girlfriends allowed.
No drugs or alcohol.
You must have mental telepathy to know what Jeffrey and Marilyn want you to do without them telling you.
You must be able to be self sufficient but have no money.
You must be able to be whipped when Jeffrey is in a bad mood which is every day.
You must be willing to have two sadist lesbians ruin your life daily for their pleasure.
You must refrain from using the word pussy and speak only of the vagina.
Anal sex with Lori is a requirement to keep her happy as required by Jeffrey.
Occasional gay sex with David is required but only on the D.L.
You must wear a purple pair of bikini underwear huge that fits Brian.
Chickenhawking little boys for Lori and Brian's porn movies is suggested.
Bailing out criminals with fake names is a must.
I would not perform the above duties but this is a requirement of the new position. Jeffrey insists that the new public face be willing to go to jail should things not go his way.
This is a salaried position...you pay them a salary of $27,700 for the luxury of being harassed 24/7/365 and have your family's finances ready to be accessed by Jeffrey's security advisor at a moment's notice.
This is a salaried position...you pay them a salary of $27,700 for the luxury of being harassed 24/7/365 and have your family's finances ready to be accessed by Jeffrey's security advisor at a moment's notice.
