Morally Conscious

Broadcast live streaming video on Ustrem an IBM product

VLOG cam: I like to record messages to our viewers to watch here. If there is something pressing I want you to know, watch here and you will see the latest message recorded from me!

Today's theme:
Boy did I make Lori mad today...all I had to do was talk about how much I love Christopher to someone from my work! It was like a shockwave delivered to the heart of my stalker. Lori must have some kind of weird thoughts going through her pin head tonight because she is twirling around like Linda Blair's head on a possession victim. What kind of lesbian is in love with a gay man to the point where she freaks out when he talks about his own boyfriend? Lori has some issues with reality and not knowing what it is. I know that Christopher must just cringe when she starts hearing that I don't have any kind of feelings for this high school loser! She's using yearbooks from Junior High School and high school to make up fantasies about some life she never had. I'm considering locking myself in my home again and not coming out. Total Single White Lesbian Female material. Calm down Lori, you've been dumped before...
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Tuesday, March 14, 2017

I Can't Keep Wallowing In Self Pity...This Isn't Helping Me At All

I don't like this whole money thing.  It makes me feel too much like a victim of something.  I can whine and cry about it all I want and then I feel like it is just so much self pity.  I don't like feeling like some kind of cry baby, but damn it someone did something horribly wrong to me and made me look bad.  It's out there.  It's in the universe and it couldn't have happened without someone knowing what to do and what I wanted to do with it.  It's maddening how simple this would be to finish this case.

Officially I am over feeling bad and depressed.

Now I am ready to fight back!  I am ready to forgive my sister, if that is who I have to forgive.  I am ready to surrender to the bad feelings and start feeling better about the situation and fight back at Laurie for what she has been causing.  When you look at this situation it is all, once again, miscommunication and spin.  I won't allow this freaky girl to come into my life and destroy who I am again.  This is what she is like.  I have dealt with her for so long that now I have to be the most reasonable in my approach to taking this system apart.  Now I have to deal with things that I have in front of me without the resources I built up.  So that means I have to find them.

I will do that my own way again.

This problem with Laurie will only continue if I allow her to be this person in my life.  I don't think that is going to happen.  My life is still better than hers.  It is never going to be the thing she wants to make it in to.

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