Most of you know. I never thought that the road to my inner peace would follow a map that ran through my home town of 29 Palms, California. If you know this story, I ran away from this city because of what my first 18 years here were like. If I said they were difficult, it would be grossly understated. If I said that everyone here knew that, I would be lying. I endured a silent torture that I never burdened my friends with, but I've heard that many people knew about it. That's a theme that runs through out this story, but my perspective on that whole "betrayal" feeling, I got, at first, has given way to understanding and a need for me to help them feel better about it.
My gift, if you want to see it that way, is one of "understanding" and "healing" the problems that my friends have with this crime. There has been a tremendous amount of guilt that I've felt because of the friends that have hurt because they knew me. It's really hard to be the person that someone is stalking for this long, but, in some ways, it is even worse that I couldn't figure this out earlier so that less people would have lost their lives. It is true that this crime thrives in silence.
I mentioned recently to a friend that the problem with this "cause stalking" is that the victim has no idea what the cause could possibly be and explaining it to law enforcement is like telling them that you are being followed by a ghost. What are they supposed to do about it? When you are fed up with being followed and go to the police, your thoughts are known by the stalkers and they back off. Then, the stalkers, knowing that you've reported them, call the police and lie about you so you turn out to be the "mental" patient that escaped from the psych ward.
"Mind control" has something to do with the technology and it's capabilities, but what most people don't understand is that the worst part of "mind control" is the inability of the victim to successfully prove that it is even happening to anyone because of it's remote capabilities and scientific proof. When you are a victim of this crime, the manifestations all look "crazy" but the explanations aren't readily available; this is why our police department has a huge advantage over other law enforcement agencies. They have the ability to know what this is like, whom is responsible and that the victims are complaining of something that they fully are aware of, at least from the stand point of communication. The content of their conversations with Laurie and ours are obviously different. One enforces the law and the others are people Laurie wants arrested. Whom is benefitting from this crime? Certainly not the police when you consider the ramifications of the outcome of this investigation and the victims, for the most part, end up dead or broke or jailed or all three.
This is where I come in. There is a huge victim pool in Palm Springs, California. Much larger than anywhere else in the country in terms of concentration in one minority. The gay community here harbors more gay male victims than a city like Los Angeles has in their entire population, by far. Clearly the saturation of this crime in the gay community indicates some kind of association with our community. There isn't anywhere in the country where this crime has affected one segment of the community like it has here. We are unique. I am certain that the number of arrests in the gay community has dropped drastically since Laurie's departure in 2007. She simply can't make new victims from this position.
I started this blog for one victim, Christopher Monti. It turned into two victims, Christopher and myself. Then it got bigger when it became clearer that all of my close friends were victims too. They have friends of their own that were also victims. The scope got bigger and so did our team. This is where we've had a stall that I am hoping to correct. My job is to reach all of the local victims of this crime. Some are, not as close friends of mine, some are close friends and some, honestly, are people that I've met and don't particularly like. They aren't all very nice people, but this crime can turn you into a different person than you were when you arrived in this city. My position is one of no preference. I don't care if I know you or not. Like you or not. If you've been implanted and infected or just implanted, I am devoted to helping you. In fact, if I don't know you, I am just as dedicated to finding you and helping you out. I'm serious about your privacy and dedicated to helping you find financial recovery.
Planning this kind of operation takes time and inclination. It takes the people that we work with and some that we still don't to come up with methods of recovery that find and assist the people that are still alive and willing to be helped. There is no reason why this can't be done. It takes time, money, ideas and concern. That which was taken from the victims needs to be restored with hope and opportunity.
My road to inner peace comes from helping the people that didn't think there was any way that this crime could be stopped under the circumstances that presented themselves to them. There are a million stories about this crime from many victims and their families. Then there are the men that died before we ever got here. It's something that I've dedicated myself to do, selfishly, for my own piece of mind. Hopefully, some day, the tremendous feeling of powerlessness that I once had, will be replaced by the satisfaction of a job well done. This isn't a small crime. It is a huge civil rights dessimation. I've taken a long time to get back to my strong desire to find and heal the victims, I have a lot of pressure on my shoulders.
Helping each family understand what has happened, begins with the end of the silence about this crime and the large role it played in our LGBTQ community. From there we will educate other police departments in the world what has to happen to prevent this from ever being ignored again. Thirty years of torture is far too long for any city to suffer. The truth shall set us free.
