With evidence mounting and lies being exposed you can't imagine what waiting for thirty years of stalking to end is like. I've learned not to get mad. I've learned not to get too hopeful. One thing I am always concerned about is what life is going to be like without someone trying to kill me or harm me? Isn't that odd? I'm actually scared of not being scared any more...that's how long this has been going on.
There are so many times in the past when people could have said something to me but didn't or expected someone else to do it, but it never happened...so I've learned to support myself in a way that makes me happiest. I do the stuff I do knowing that the time will come when someone else's career will mean more to them than saving Laurie's ass...and when that happens, it will all end without her having another word to say...that's just the reality of it all.
You know it's funny, it could be almost anyone that I know that ends this crime against me...so many people have been approached and threatened. I couldn't even give you odds on whom it is going to be. Perhaps I should take a poll? Who do you think will be the person that finally drops the straw on Laurie's proverbial camel's back? Is it you? Is it your mom? Is it your father? I really don't have a clear cut favorite here...most people expect me to say Christopher, but he's actually a bit too new to this torture even though it's been going on for 7 years or so for him. I don't even know if he's in California any more or what he's learned about this crime on his own. Heck, he may be in jail again as far as I know. I hope not.
I can't really do the research I like to do the most because of a warrant issued for my arrest...I can't really find the people I need to find any more because that is too dangerous...finding Christopher is always a box of butterflies because God only knows what she's done to him by now.
I don't know...maybe you know better?
Strange wondering how it will all fall into place though...becoming the person that was "stalked for thirty years by someone that he met in junior high school" isn't exactly the most exciting thing either. I sometimes wish my stalker was smarter or more cunning...but the fact is that her hatred of me is very well known. Her actions are also well known. I think it is really interesting to ponder this quality problem knowing that it will end because someone else's life is in jeopardy and still not mine...this torture will end for me because someone else's livelihood is threatened, mine still isn't important enough. Isn't that kinda sad? If nobody else ever feared losing their family or their money or their loved ones, nobody would ever step up...but I'll take what I can get.
Grateful sometimes means being just glad it's over for whatever reason.
