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All jokes about "playing with my balls" aside, someone chipped my ball and nobody had the right to do that. I want to make a concept perfectly clear to all of you, including my own team members and their families...so that there is no more misunderstanding in the future.
A very wise man once told me that life was about balance...not too much of one thing or another...I misunderstood that concept to believe it was about juggling everything. That was a mistake. Now that I am older and have been through way more than I had been through then, I have a better understanding of what "balance" means. How you control that balance. I liken it to a basketball and the metaphor that I am using is that my life is like a basketball that I get to choose how it is played with.
Your life is like a ball that you can choose to either let other people play with or not. The problem with electronic harassment is that someone along the line, that I trusted to play with my ball, allowed someone else to play with it without my permission. When he allowed that to happen, Laurie and Brian stuck a tracking RFID chip inside of my ball to allow themselves the ability to know where my ball was, whom was allowed to play with it, where it had been and what it was doing all the time. This is what happens when you allow other people to play with your ball without explaining to them that you won't allow anyone else to play with it unless they ask you about it.
I have one friend that is two separate people. He is ultra protective of his career at work and separates his home life from his work. In one place he is Mr. "So and So" and in the other, he is "Dude So and so"...I admired that quality about him. It seemed like two separate worlds and I thought that was the way to be. Not so for me. Life isn't two separate basketballs, it is just one...no matter what he says, when you look at the ball at the end of the game, it was only played with one ball with many panels maybe, but one ball.
When I was being stalked in San Diego, I pretended to be like my best friend with one professional life and a whole bunch of personal lives that I did not allow to intersect. There was only one problem with that. Laurie already knew that in the one ball I had, there was a chip that told her and her brother, Brian, exactly how and why I separated my life into different balls that I juggled. Certainly a person has the right to decide what people in his life know what about what, but Laurie, knowing why he separates those worlds, just loves to fuck that up. She loves to create drama by telling one person what the ball owner doesn't want them to know. She loves to fuck with people. She likes to cross the lines that a person sets for themselves and their friends...the boundaries that you keep for yourself, she destroys by using that RFID fucking chip that she stuck in your ball while someone else was allowed to play with it.
Laurie has hundreds of gay men in Palm Springs that are willing to play with your ball and some of them are willing to hand it over to her without you knowing or having given them permission to do so. This is where people have to understand something. Life isn't juggling five balls at once, it's about maintaining the one ball that you have and not letting Laurie touch it at anytime.
My own team is guilty of using my ball without asking or telling me where they are taking it. They want me to trust and understand that they wouldn't do anything to hurt my ball, but at the same time, they too are microchipped and their unilateral decision making without my consent on matters allows Laurie access to my ball without my permission. Nobody knows my ball or ball handling skills with my ball better than me...and nobody has permission to play with it without my consent. My team has my permission to keep Laurie from playing with my ball at all costs...but they don't have my permission to keep taking it whenever they want and using it without at least consulting with me about what their intentions are.
They wouldn't want me to do this with their lives, so I don't understand how they can do this with mine without playing better defense against Laurie. Trust comes from denying her all access to my ball.
Whomever it was that took the liberty of handing my ball, my body, over to Laurie without my consent or permission should also be in big trouble for what they did. If it was intentional...then they should be charged with the initial crime.
Everyone only gets one ball to play with their entire life...even if they have to start all over again...one body, one ball, one life. The police don't have the right to know anything about where it is, what it is doing or whom is playing with it...I don't know where they got the impression that this was their right to make decisions like this for the gay community...it was a huge mistake.
Once friends make the decision to work on my team and don't consult me, then they have made a decision using my ball. They didn't ask and then Laurie gets a chance to play with it again. Christopher wouldn't tell me the absolute truth about what his involvement and experience was with Laurie and that too used my ball because I trusted him with it. Let me be clear...I don't trust anyone with my ball until they realize that if Laurie and Brian have contacted them, then they have to tell me. If you don't, then you don't have permission to play with me or my ball. Period.
Honesty has been lacking in electronic harassment now for decades...it's time that honest people are rewarded for not playing with other people's lives without permission.
