Ah yes, Mother's Day! The day Laurie hates the most in the universe. You all know Laurie's theory, don't you? If it is Mother's Day, shouldn't Laurie's mother do something for her? Um, no Ms. Selfish. This is the day that you should be nice to the woman that gave birth to you and be thankful that your pitchfork and horns didn't kill her during your birth; which is a miracle since your brother's pitchfork and horns didn't do her in during his. That poor woman deserves the happiest Mother's Day of all. By the way, she has lots of people that love her and that think she did a great job keeping you from hurting people while she raised you. You two are just too crazy for any two parents to handle. Drugs didn't help either.
I want to take a moment to remind everyone to tell their mothers that they love them and that we know that they were right. They did know best. I know I have some issues right now and I'm not always happy, but overall, my mom isn't wrong. She pushes me harder to do more. Today was no exception. For those of you that know what I was up to today, it was all for her. Well, it was for me too, but as most of you know, the best thing that you can ever do for your mother, in a situation like mine, is better. Am I right Mrs. Durant? I know I am.
To all the mothers of my friends, I know that I am hard on you because I know that you expect so much from me. I didn't start this project to take it easy on my friends. I expect you to be the moms of my friends that made them the creative, hard working, special people that they are. Be hard on them. Love them, but make them work. You know what works better than I ever could. Now is not the time to rest, it is the time to take advantage of what we have. I need these moms to do their best momming.
Thank you ladies for putting up with my rants. I know that I'm not easy on any of you. I expect to hear all of you let me know that you aren't happy with some of my tactics. That comes with the job and I expect that. Understand that you will meet a much nicer and understanding person than you hear on my bad days and the same person that you hear on my good ones.
To my celebrity friends and moms, thank you for your constant support and love. I love knowing that you know what is going on. Every day I have you understanding that there are all kinds of celebrities...some you know about, and some, like me, you never knew existed in worlds you never heard of, it is the weirdest thing I can teach you. Thank you for learning what so few could ever understand. I implore you to learn as much as you can.
To all of you fathers that are mothers...God bless you for being both. That isn't the easiest job either. You are special and nobody knows the sacrifices you make. I hear you and have friends that will help.
My love to all and remember, mom knows best.
