If you only knew how much Christian and Laurie were pushing me to be angry with other people right now you would understand my anger with other people. It's always a precarious balancing act between how much emotion I can let you all know I am feeling and what I am willing to say. I can say that this is a very difficult time for me. It is one of about nine times that I can count where everything is fucked up. Nothing is going right and I know what lies ahead. It isn't a good time for the victims of this crime and it is a terrible time for me to be helping anyone. Unfortunately that is the exact opposite of what I am feeling.
I want to be working for the police. I want to be working with them and exposing this crime with law enforcement instead of watching others do a less than satisfactory job playing at investigation knowing that I am much better at this than they are. You don't hire a plumber to paint your home, you hire a house painter, you know what I mean? It's just one more situation where the expert is not being used and the pretenders are. I've been so frustrated with investigating this crime because I'm the one that worked so hard at putting Laurie in the negative position that she is in. She knows that if I were in charge and allowed to work this case the way I can, she would never be able to survive it. If I were allowed to communicate with my team the way I should be allowed to, we'd be way past finished instead of watching other people die. It's not satisfying, at all, to know that people that should be saved aren't going to be because someone is worried about his "image". It's not acceptable to me.
I've always maintained that I don't want to be the guy that says that I didn't do my best from the moment that I learned whom Lisa was. Once I found out whom she was, it wasn't a surprise that I knew her and that she was the person that made the most sense. Nobody that I know from high school will be surprised either. Almost everyone I know will say, "That doesn't surprise me at all!" She's not without her controversy her whole life and I'm sure there are hundreds more stories that I haven't even heard about from that time period. Like I've said, I don't know her very well. I wasn't a friend and I wasn't someone that had much to do with her. My very limited dealings with her were not pleasant, they were bully situations. I was bullied by her and abused by her. I had no idea how many times my friends were approached by her to bully me and I've heard this trend continued my whole life.
Now I hear that there are sexually oriented videos of her doing this to both Christopher and Anthony available where she is soliciting them for sex then telling them horrible things about me and my family. Sounds eerily familiar. I would love for the police department to see these and compare them to the restraining order then arrest warrant that exists and see that what is on the record does not match up with what she has sworn to. It is exactly what I know is the most crazy thing of all. I am being stalked by someone that has some kind of sexual thing for my friends and boyfriend. It isn't something that she wants people to know about. It is so embarrassing to me. I want people to know that she is following me and that I have nothing to do with it. It has been interfering with my informant work and she even claims to work for the police in one or both of the videos. It is precisely what the restraining order application denies. I needed this information years ago but nobody came forward.
The police need to know why their informants are being intimidated. These videos show whom is behind it.
